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HUMOUR ME - short funny jokes; laughing tonics

U see dis life is like EBA; Anybody can make it
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Nobody keeps secret like a Nigerian travelling abroad for the first time,The fear of Village people is d Beginning of wisdom
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Thank God I saved a life today . . . I asked a Beggar, How will u feel if I give u 10 million naira He replied, "Oh Lad I will just die" So I kept my money.
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When you send me a friend request with your profile picture as a car, do you want me to open the door and check who is inside?
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Even if you post his picture and caption it "My boo","Bae","Father of my kids",if they want him they still take him.. Small girls with Big God
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Your boyfriend's slim and you're slim Whenever you guys are holding hands on the road..you two be looking like capital letter H
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My Neighbour Is Planning on Bringing Witch Doctor 2 d Compound Just Because Someone Stole His πŸ”. Chicken That's Not sweetπŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹
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Dating a girl that bleach is frustrating,she will be pregnant and u will be expecting a cute baby like c. Ronaldo boom , oshiomole will come out.
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Please can someone send money into my bank account I just want to know If the alert is working Please
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>If you can't manage a *relationship*, you can try other *SHIPS* like. *internship , kingship or fellowship*
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One remarkable thing about living in a single room is that you will wake up and see all your properties at once πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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Dating a broke yahoo boy is so confusing you will be like if I leave him now he may blow tomorrow πŸ˜‚ Girls una too like money
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Being Dumped BY Someone You Truly LOVE, Can Make You Watch T.V Without Volume For 8Hours.
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The way Nigerian police will be shouting ''lets go to the station''. You will think it's something 50 naira cannot solve...abeg take... 😎😎
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I Stopped Watching Nolly wood Movies when I Heard A Blind Woman Saying"My Son, I'm Happy To See You."
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Since I removed Fat People From My Face book And Whats App, My Mb Dey Last Now, Even My Battery Too.. In short My Phone Has Stop *Hanging...πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€*
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Threatening a Yoruba person with " I GO SHOW YOU PEPPER " is like telling a monkey " I wee give u banana " Wisdom won't kill me. πŸ˜‚
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English teacher will tell me to write composition about myself and still score me 2/10.... Please sir, Are you me? Is you me? Are me you? Is you I? I is me? πŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ˜’
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I don't like people who can't let go of the past especially people am owing money😏😏😏
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How can somebody be so broke..to the extent that when you call his number it will say..."The number you are calling cannot be RICH
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Some People Will Still Fail This Simple Question. What's Ur ATM Pin code?
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Tears of joy is when a car hit you down you see Dangote coming out from the car
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I will be having a small party at my place this weekend. if you are free and interested you can also do the same at your place.
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I want A Relationship πŸ’That Will Lead To Somewhere...Like Paris Or Dubai! πŸ—ΌπŸ—½ Not fast food joint and bar
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When you die, you don't know that you are Dead . All the pain is felt by others .The same thing happens when you are stupid.
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When you broke, you start remembering where you ate and didn't collect change
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Not everyone who checks up on you actually Cares..some want to confirm if their witchcraft worked.
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Remember back then when u were a kid, and u thought ur 25 years old unemployed uncle wasn't serious about life? Look at yourself nowπŸ˜‚
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Slap me ,stab me,offend me I will forgive u. But if u jump me while sharing jollof rice @ a Wedding, Trust me we will die together
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That moment when you help your mum to shout your siblings names and she be like "Oh you're even there Oya come and do it"πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜‚πŸšΆ
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When I finally buy my range rover, I will drive to the house of my ex and ask for the direction to my own house from her 😁😁😁
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Nolly wood sef have tire me ... how can Angel be putting on eye glass 😒😒
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Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? Student: A teacher! πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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That embarrassing moment when you're seated beside your crush in church and then your kid bro came running with #20 note in his hands... "Brother.. mummy said I should give u for offering" πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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I will Name My Daughter "Not Interested" So when these Guys be like Hi Babe, I am Dennis She will simply be like Hi Dennis, I am Not Interested.
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Old People Will Act As If They Know Everything Until Its Time To Load Airtime.
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In Nigeria there is nothing like battery full,we charge till NEPA takes light and if they bring it again we continue charging😁
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Work hard so you can discipline your kids with Gucci belt ... not a sticksπŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ€£πŸ˜†πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒ
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I wonder why visitors act like they are concentrating on Tv, when they see you coming in with food
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Good morning to all the ladies, as for you guys I'm sure you're man enough to greet yourselves.
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Teacher: Eggistu, Mention (10) wild animals you know.
Eggistu: 5 Lions & 5 Tigers😠😠😝
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You're not ugly. You just need money, Good Camera & abroad weather. ☝☝☝☝☝
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After buying my iPhone 8+, I now understand why iPhone users behave as if they don’t have pockets. How can I put a whole plot of land in my pocket?? “πŸ˜…πŸ˜…
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A POST ON SOCIAL MEDIA
If u knw u are not up to 18 on my friendlist kindly say hi let me take u to children department. 😞
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<))>
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How girls stand when asking their boyfriend's, "Baby, who is she??"
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Of all men Adam was the happiest; He had no mother-in-law.
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Some Africans will travel abroad for one week and and take 500 pictures, come back and be posting it small small for 5 years.I don't know who bewitched my fellow brothers and sisters
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Once an African ghetto boy owns a laptop, He becomes a Dj
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Those who did Agriculture at School why do Chickens run before having sex?
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Some 9ja police go belike "stop there!!! Mr man, why are you walking on the road with singlet in this cold weather??😨😨😨 you want cold to enter your body so you will go and look for somebody's daughter to rape abi?πŸ˜•πŸ˜¦ You are under arrest for attempting rape in Advance My friend enter motor πŸš– πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸƒ πŸƒ πŸƒ πŸƒ
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