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TOP 50 VERY SHORT FUNNY DIS JOKES - sarcasm, girl dis; laughing tonic; comedy pills

D kinda πŸ‘€ lashes som girls fix eeh,u won't need hand fan again. They should just be blinking their eyes n ur sweat wil dry off!
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He promise 2 take u 2 places u ve never been b4 & u were happy. he took u 2 his village & u re angry, My sister ve u be dere b4?
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Nobody has many Cousins and Uncles than a cheating Girlfriend.
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Some of these little girls are 15 years old and already on Facebook posting "I''M IN LOVE". Little girl who are you in love with? Spongebob?
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¶¶ ... You owe nobody a Flat Tummy Shine on with your GP tank biko πŸƒ πŸƒ πŸƒ
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My sister, you expect your boyfriend to be rich in his 20s , while your father is still broke in his 60's. #BeReal Dis is Africa.
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My sister, please match your makeup with your neck. You can't be Rihanna and black otutu at the same time.
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Girls’ eyebrows these days are looking like they got sponsored by NIKE
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Every woman should have four pets in her life:
A mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass who pays for everything” – Paris Hilton
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Sex is not the answer; Yes is the answer
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I’m sorry I didn’t mean to “Push all your buttons, I was just looking for mute!
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I stopped trusting women when my class three girlfriend left me for another boy all because he bought a sharpener and a mirror – Mugabe
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Good girls are found in every corner of the earth; but unfortunately, Earth is round
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A jelous woman does better research than the FBI
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Arguing with a woman is like getting arrested. Everything you say can and will be used against you
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A woman’s anger is like a check engine light. There’s no way to figure out why it came on. Just ignore it and hope it goes away
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I’m sorry I didn’t mean to “push all your buttons” I was just looking for mute
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When a woman says “WHAT?” It’s not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said
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If women ruled the world there would be no wars …. Just a bunch of countries not talking to each other
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A jelous girlfriend can even look at your calendar and ask who is July?
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Women are like volcanoes. Both stay calm for extended periods of time before exploding and killing everything in their path. Then they are calm again
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Line dancing was started by women waiting to use the bathroom
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2 THEORIES ON ARGUING WITH A GIRL
1) If the girl is right, be fair with her and keep quiet
2) If the girl is wrong, be fair to yourself and keep quiet
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Ladies don't let your man value you ONLY at night, you’re not a torch light
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Behind every heels there is a slippers inside the handbag. If you know, you know.
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Why buy a lipstick worth #5,000 for a lip that can't even pronounce Ecclesiastes
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Ugly girls hardly change profile foto because they know how they suffered to look handsome in the previous foto πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£
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Tall girls pressing phone at night be looking like street lights🀭
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When some girls are looking for boyfriend U I'll see dem uploading pictures with the tag @no body's Queen with no worries
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If u visit a guy & he takes ur slippers inside. My sister forget it, u re a side chick. Don't wait 4 a pastor to tell u
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And ladies are always like.... "All he wants is sex" My sister have you tried giving him money and he rejected? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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My sister, please match your makeup with your neck. You can't be Rihanna and black otutu at the same time.
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If Slim Girls are called Bae fat girls should be called basin
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I told a SLAY QUEEN to download IMO for video call, and She told me she prefer Anambra. Please where can I faint comfortably?
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When you see cockroaches in your house it's a sign you have food. Cockroaches are like slay Queens, they hate poverty
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Two ladies become friends easily if they hate the same lady!
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Having sex with him doesn't make his car yours
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Women will tell you dat men can lie, cheat, etc. But they seem to forget that what a man can do a woman can do better… πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒ
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Ladies please dont kill yourself trying to look expensive, Most men dont even know the difference between Brazilian hair and goat hair.
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I went to my girlfriends place I cracked a joke and the guy under the bed started laughingπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ™†
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A broke girl's favorite sentence "can you do me a favour?"
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Are you still angry? " That's how 99% of African girls do apologize.
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My gf asked me for her birthday gift, she demanded a gift that will last for the year 2018. I gave her a 2018 calendar.
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Don't feel bad if girl's don't reply to your inbox some of them can't read
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The way some girls smoke these days, I pray they don't give birth to firewood..
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''I don't date guys who don't have cars'',says a girl who bath with a soap till it becomes size of a simcard.
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No girl is ugly...It's just that some of them look like their fathers ..
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For some of the ladies! If you count the number of beds they have slept on, it's enough to open 17 Hospitals!
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When a woman decides to revenge..... Even the devil sits down to take lessons
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Dear ladies If you want to beg for airtime, please make it clear abeg. . What is, You're such a handsome man. I wish I could continue chatting with you but my data has expired?
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