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TOP 5O VERY SHORT FUNNY STUPID JOKES - laughing tonics, written comedy

So far so good, Toilet is still the best place to chew Stolen Meat😹😹😹😹
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Hot temper is not good at all I almost told my wife that I caught my girlfriend with another man πŸ™ŠπŸ˜€πŸ˜€guess what would have happened
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Fat ladies are always shy to hang their Pant outside because it will be looking like a school signboard 😁😁😁😁😁
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Did you know Having too many Fat Girls on your List Drains your Phone Battery. πŸ˜€πŸ˜€
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Who prepared the food that I ate in my dream last night? Please reduce the pepper tonight, I beg, I'm on my knees πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸƒπŸƒ
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80 percent of unwanted pregnancies started from “Bros abeg open door make I charge phone"πŸ˜‚
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All those #Students that use to go and tell Teachers that we have "Free Period" so that they can come and use it... I hope you have now become Ministers of information! Ndi araπŸ˜ πŸ˜ πŸ˜ πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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If your class has too many pretty girls you are studying a useless Course
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I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid; I really thought you already knew!
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If I Died, I want my friends to keep updating my status to freak people out
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I’m not a complete idiot…..some parts are missing
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They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as much as possible. I’ll soon be a genius.
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I didn’t fart, My ass likes you so much. It just blew you a kiss
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Of course I talk to my self. Self…..Sometimes I need expert advice
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OMG! I have finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain; on the left side, there is nothing right, and on the right side, there is nothing left!!
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At least it’s better to be someone who cannot think clearly than one who clearly cannot think
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I wish I were a unicorn so that I could stab people with my head
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A giraffe’s coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of his throat. Even think about that? No. You only think about yourself.
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What do you take when your butt hurts? Assprin
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If you’re going to be a smart ass – first you have to be smart otherwise you are just an ass
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Sometimes, when I close my eyes I can’t see
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I hate when I forget to press send and I’m sitting there like an idiot waiting for a reply
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Everyone has the right to be stupid…..It’s just that some people abuse the privilege
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I don’t like to think before I speak. I like to be just as as surprised as everyone else about what comes out of my mouth
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I never make the same mistake twice….I make it 5 or 6 times just to be sure
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Whenever you feel sad, just remember that somewhere in this world there is an idiot pulling a door that says, “Push”
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Laughing is the best medicine but if you’re laughing for no reason, you may need medicine
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I love you with all my butt, would have said heart but my butt is bigger
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I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
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My kid is just as weird and twisted as I am. I’m not sure if I should be proud or scared
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Life is tough, but it’s tougher if you are stupid
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Inspiration strikes at very funny times
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When you die, you don't know that you are Dead . All the pain is felt by others .The same thing happens when you are stupid.
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Slap me ,stab me,offend me I will forgive u. But if u jump me while sharing jollof rice @ a Wedding, Trust me we will die together
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ON A FATHER'S DAY
Yesterday would have been your day as well but you asked her to abort Maybe u will b celebrated on world abortion day; idiot
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80 percent of unwanted pregnancies started from “Bros abeg open door make I charge phone"
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When you find the key to Success, Some Idiots change the lock; so stop finding the key and break the door"
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I am so angry that I wanna eat my dinner this morning
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Girl's that wear heels πŸ‘  to event & come back with slippers don't last in marriage πŸ’ they can't endureπŸ‘Œ πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸƒπŸƒ
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Cigarettes and weed are for small boys Real men smoke mosquito coil
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I thought people said weed is bad..... I just smoked it now and feel nothing happens to me....... meanwhile I've sold my phone to buy airtime
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Boys,the best way to propose to a girl Take her to the boat in the middle of a river and say "Honey marry me or leave my boat"
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No matter how bad you are, you're not useless. You can still be used as a bad example.
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Girls With Big Forehead Hardly Forgive People.✋ πŸ˜‚
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Dump your girlfriend if she counts money from the ATM. If she can’t trust a machine there’s no way she'll trust you.
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I am in need of a girlfriend that will be with me until I find my future wife...πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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Even if am dating 5 girls, it doesn't mean you should steal one na, me that I'm gathering them, am I mad?
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The main reason I don't feel like getting married now is dat, everyone Will Know am having sex including my mum and Dad, And it Makes me feel shy πŸ™ˆπŸ˜’
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When a herdsman dies, his son inherits his cows., but when a professor dies his certificates becomes a waste. Moral Lesson: use your school fees to buy cows. Wisdom will not kill me
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Hold and secure ur job ooo U see a these youth wen just finish NYSC I nor like their πŸ‘€ eyes
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